Why Some Couples Have a Terrible Time on Their Wedding Day — And How to Avoid It

Your wedding absolutely can and will be joyful, unforgettable and incredibly special. But that doesn’t mean it has to be perfect or the best of your entire life. That phrase — “the happiest day of your life” — puts too much pressure on one single day. Sometimes expectations of a peak experience are just too high, and trying to force the day to be “perfect” often leads to the exact opposite experience. And it’s heartbreaking — especially after all the insane amount of time, energy, and money that goes into planning.

Let go the week before

One of the best things you can do for yourself is to release anything that didn’t get done.

• Didn’t finish your signage? Let it go.

• Meant to write notes for every guest but didn’t manage yet? Let it go.

• Planned personalised favours but ran out of time? Let it go.

Your guests won’t notice what’s missing — but they will remember how you made them feel. And that starts with you feeling calm and present.

Don’t be in charge on the day

This is the biggest mistake: couples trying to run the show on their own wedding day.

If you’re the main point of contact for suppliers, solving problems, or still decorating the venue — you’re not enjoying your own wedding, you are working.

Someone else needs to be in charge. Whether it’s a wedding coordinator or a friend you trust, hand over the logistics completely.

📥 Download the Wedding Day Coordination Checklist to see exactly what needs to be handed off — and to whom.

What actually helps

Here’s what makes the biggest difference:

• Buffer time — don’t schedule your morning down to the minute

• A clear run sheet — every supplier should have a copy

• Moments of calm — build in breathing space:

  • 10 minutes after getting dressed

  • 5 minutes to sit during dinner

  • A quiet moment together before your entrance

These pauses are what you’ll remember — not the perfectly folded napkins.

It’s not about perfection

The most important reminder: your wedding day is about the two of you getting married, with your favourite people there to celebrate. Everything else — the flowers, the decor, the playlist — is just stuff.

Go with the flow. Look around and take it in - the love of your life and everyone you care about is here, all in one room. This is once in a lifetime! Be present. Things will happen. But even the wildest of hiccups won’t ruin your day if you’ve worked on your mindset ahead of time.

Real life story: I once had a bride whose dress snapped in half right before she was due to walk down the aisle. I found her calmly standing there with a roll of duct tape, ready to tape the dress back together if she had to. She told me, "I'm still getting married — it’s just a dress." (For the record — I managed to fix the dress, she didn’t get married in duct tape, but her attitude has stayed with me.)

Final thought

You’ve done the work. You’ve planned with intention. Now let yourself enjoy the day.

Let go of the little things. Hand over control. Trust that what’s done is enough.

This isn’t a performance. It’s a celebration of love.

📥 Download the Wedding Day Timeline Builder to feel clear and calm heading into the day
💬 Related: Your Morning-of Timeline — Hair, Makeup, Breakfast, and Photos
💬 Related: If There’s No Coordinator, Who’s Running the Day?